of which’s 6:30 AM on July 19, 2017.
I’m sitting in my kitchen, getting ready to go to work.
I’ve been contemplating of which return to writing here on my blog. I haven’t written nearly as much as I used to along with also almost nothing in recent years. So much has happened. I considered, at one point, deleting of which blog. I thought maybe of which had run of which’s course. yet every day I get hits. 20, 30, 50…
Every day, a large number of dads stumble across of which page in their sorrow along with also sadness along with also find some measure of peace.
There is actually a pattern. I get the heaviest traffic on Sunday nights along with also Mondays. I know exactly why. of which’s the day most of us take our kids back to their mother’s along with also we are alone again. Mondays are the first day we wake up without them after a weekend visit. The pain is actually crushing.
I lived of which way for 15 years. My daughter was only 18 months old when we divorced along with also I spent her entire childhood, rebounding by the pain of every-different-weekend fatherhood.
I watched as her life disintegrated because of her mother’s second marriage. I rescued her many times by the clutches of the animal her mom was married to.
In 2008 I lost my career along with also then my home when the economy collapsed. Because her life was in such turmoil, I could not leave to find work. I had to stay in Nashville. So I stayed. of which meat living in my car. I was homeless for 6 years, until 2014 when I was hired by my alma mater along with also my daughter moved here with me.
A lot of damage was done. She went by age ten to age 16 without her dad having a place to live. We lost our weekends together. I saw her during the week, along with also I’d pick her up on a Saturday to spend a few hours, yet of which wasn’t the same. of which hurt like nothing I can describe. yet I stayed.
I stayed along with also I endured of which horror because she needed me.
I know there are a lot of guys reading of which who are inside the same boat. I know there are others who could not handle the disappointment along with also chose to leave. I know there are some reading of which article of which morning who are on the brink…you are facing divorce along with also you think the best thing is actually to just walk away. There are others who are like I was…so broken along with also crushed of which you wonder how you’re going to make of which through another day. The pain by missing your kids is actually so great along with also your life feels so empty without them, of which you consider not living at all.
To those men I say, “Hold on.” Even through tears, even through disappointment along with also mistreatment by your ex along with also by the courts along with also sometimes by your kids. Hold on. My daughter wasn’t always aware of my sacrifices when I was producing them, yet she is actually today. Hold on.
There is actually trust. You can make of which. There is actually a God in heaven who loves you. He sees your tears along with also feels the pain you feel. I have no secrets to how I endured six years of homelessness for the sake of my daughter except of which…only my faith in Jesus Christ got me through. There were nights I considered just letting myself freeze to death. Or buying a bottle along with also drinking myself blind along with also letting myself die. yet my faith sustained me. of which wasn’t pretty. I cried all the same tears. I suffered the same broken heart. yet I did not suffer alone. Jesus walked each painful step.
Dads…do not give up. Do. Not. Give. Up. Find yourself inside the faith I speak of here. Lean on the God who adores you along with also wants to help you through of which. He loves you. He loves your children.
Trust Him to give you the strength to stay till the end.
You are loved.
You are still the daddy.