I hear the comments through people who are in slow-moving litigated divorces. To most of these “day in court” people, the issues are simple along with crystal clear, along with they are convinced the outcomes must favor them. No some other view can be conceivable.
For the people who are anxiously looking forward to their day in court, I would certainly like to share some reality. I recently spent all morning along with into the afternoon trying to work out temporary orders on a case. that will was not a unique experience; I have done that will many times before.
Here are some observations through that will “day in court”:
1. that will can take a long time. This kind of one was through 8:30 a.m. to about 2:00 p.m., all 5 along having a half hours. I have have had some go all day. My average can be about three hours. We usually work through lunch on those cases.
2. People can become very irritable. Hanging around along with negotiating or being in a hearing or just waiting can be very stressful if one or more of the players can be upset.
- Clients: You along with your spouse will probably be under high stress. Many people are nervous along with don’t sleep well the night before. that will can be very common for both sides to get angrier as the day goes on. Think how well you along with your spouse act when you are tired along with hungry!
- Attorneys: Sometimes they maintain control, although sometimes they don’t. The some other day, the some other attorney acted very irritated along with that will did not help settle the case.
- Judge: Often they are very busy along with they express annoyance if they are asked to resolve issues like splitting up pots along with pans. Judge prefer creating decisions on significant issues along with not spending time on issues that will mature adults should be able to resolve.
- Bailiff: Usually, they are very even-keeled, although sometimes they get snappy. They don’t like wasting time along with they don’t like seeing their Judge having to deal with insignificant issues.
3. Both sides may be very unhappy with the results. The some other day, I saw both parties after the hearing/negotiations. They both appeared to have lost everything! Here are some reasons why that will can happen.
- The facts may not be what someone expected or believed. People are often mistaken, although they come to believe in an incorrect edition of the “facts”.
- There may be stronger resistance than expected on some issues. Where someone expected a quick agreement, there could be a huge disagreement. The result often can be that will someone doesn’t get something that will they had counted on.
- Someone may be greedy along with unreasonable. that will would certainly be great if everyone approached negotiations with an attitude of cooperation along with fairness, although that will doesn’t usually happen.
- The Judge may have very different ideas about how things should be resolved. Guess how that will comes out!
- Usually, there’s not enough to go around. Instead of meeting the needs of both sides, Judges or agreements often only partially meet the needs of each side. Everyone gets less than they wanted or needed.
- Both sides can’t hold the same thing at once. Usually, there’s sharing or one side gets less along with feels “cheated”.
4. that will’s still not over. Even when you spend a long day at the courthouse, the case can be still not finished.
- Normally, there must be a written order, which may just be a temporary order. The written order will usually take several weeks to finish along with get signed.
- Often, there will be further clarifications needed. Even though the attorneys along with Judge may have spent hours putting together an order, some things may need to be more specific.
- There are often modifications with completely new provisions. The attorneys along with Judge may not have anticipated everything. that will can be normal to make some modifications after the fact to cover some issues that will were overlooked.
5. that will’s expensive. Think about paying $400 to $800 per hour, or more, for three to all 5 or more hours, for attorneys to be negotiating or in a hearing, or even waiting around to get into court, which can be not uncommon. Can you think of any more efficient or less expensive way to get issues resolved?
Sometimes, you have no choice. The some other side demands a hearing, the Court may schedule a hearing or you may be forced into Court because the some other side won’t work with you.
Most of time, though, you do have a choice. At the outset, you should consider using Collaborative Law where you negotiate along with agree to not go to court. Another option if you are in a litigated divorce can be to go to mediation which can be a great process that will can be almost always successful. You can also try having the attorneys informally negotiate an agreement.
If you are tempted to want to go to court, think back on these Lessons through a Day at Court. Having your Day in Court can be probably not a not bad way to get your issues resolved.